February 20-Impressions: Big to Small

Impression of: South East Asia

Driving through Chiang Mai, on our first day here, my eyes weren't attracted to the markets stalls, the dogs laying on the roads, the palm trees, the crazy vehicles, or any of the usual things. I was too busy staring at all of the foreigners. I hadn't seen so many white/black people in six months. Isn't it weird that in South East Asia, I've seen more foreigners then I've seen in half a year? I'm starting to understand why the Korean people generally stare at me. I was doing it for crying outloud!

Foreigners dress strangely and inappropriately (does NO ONE follow the legs OR chest rule anymore!?!?). Foreigners can also be shaped very oddly, due to the unhealthy, chemical-ridden food they eat (VERY few Asian people have thunder thighs, saddle bags, or muffin tops, if they are going to carry extra weight, it's usually right in the belly). And I'm one of the oddly-shaped, inappropriately dressed foreigners. Weird.

Impressions of: Vietnam

In Vietnam 98% of all adults and 10% of all children wear helmets on scooters (apparently the soft skulls of children are more resilient than adult skulls). Compared to Thailand and Cambodia, this is a 98/10% increase in helmut use. Unfortunately, the Vietnamese also follow another traffic law: they beep their horns when they pass another vehicle. Every. Single. Time.

And not just a little tap either. It's a continuous lean on the horn.

In this country, I'd say 90% of all motorists are on scooters, motercycles, or some cross in between. Can you imagine how often thousands of two-wheeled vehicles all going down the same road overtake one another? Now imagine that you're in a great, big, tourbus on this road, filled with wimpy motercycles. I was ready to go to the front of the bus, and rip off the steering wheel, to prevent the driver from honking ANY more.

Today we rented bicycles and it was the same thing. Everytime any motorized vehicle passed us, they blew their horns. SO ANNOYING.

One time in particular, I was re-entering the road from a convenience store on the shoulder. I carefully waited for a large break in traffic before going back on the road. Obviously I normally hug the side of the road as much as possible without actually leaving the pavement.

However, I was driving a huge, wobbly, banana-bike, and for the first few unsteady seconds, I accidentally drifted into the middle of the road.

BLAM BLAM BLAM!!!

Honks the tourbus behind me (and it's not like there was a danger of him hitting me, I didn't dart in front of him, he was FAR behind me).

As I gained momentum (and therefore control) I moved to the side of the road, with him BLAMMING at me the ENTIRE , oh I don't know, fifteen seconds it took me to get out of his way. Not content with a clear path, the driver slowed down and kept pace beside me for a good 50 metres, BLAMMING and yelling at me the entire time.

I didn't so much as blink in acknowledgement. But I really wanted him to come out and fight me.

Impressions of: Mui Ne

I'll write more about the beauty of this place later on (someone needs the computer at the moment).

Except last night, as I was cowering under mosquito netting, wondering if four-inch-long, grasshopper-like insects were dangerous, I had a bit of a moment of truth. The above-mentioned insect clinging to my curtains was causing me an unusual hesitation at the thought of turning off the lights and going to sleep.

Instead of being wimpy, I got the bug out myself (which involved squealing, throwing the curtains out the window, and slamming the window shut). Still, I'm taking care of business by myself more and more. It feels good.